For Science

9 Nov

My first memories are of me being brought home by a little girl and her family. I was obtained from some sort of shelter in which they keep dogs to be distributed to families. She was so happy to bring me home but over time she stopped playing with me. Eventually, I learned to amuse myself by escaping from the back yard where they kept me. I would roam the streets and chase cars until my owners would realize I was missing, and only then would they search for me. After many months of roaming the streets and eating whatever I could find, a young woman took me to her house. From then on I have lived with this woman and her son. From what I can gather, my new owners took me from my old home, I can not establish whether or not I was traded for something.

To this day, I still eat whatever I find. My owners get very angry with me sometimes. Apparently, some of the things that I find delicious are quite important to my masters. On multiple occasions I have been yelled at for eating things like “money” and “phone chargers”. As of yet, I have not determined why these things are important to them. Through research, I intend to discover what role these items play in the lives of these confusing humans. I vow to eat, or at least chew, anything I find to better my knowledge of the humans. For the benefit of myself, and for science!




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